Happy Earth Day, Bitches

April 22nd, 2008 by Evil Carbon

So, today is Earth Day. I started thinking… what can I do to celebrate? Good thing wikihow.com provides a list of 15 ways to celebrate. I’m just going to pick my 5 favorites.

1. Reduce, reuse and recycle all day long (but after that, I’m done)
2. Sing or listen to “Earth” songs (I am going to limit this 3 John Denver songs and my own version of “Home on the Range”)
3. Consider buying a carbon offset to make up for the greenhouse gas emissions you create on the other 364 days of the year (OK, I considered it… riduculous)
4. Wear green and/or brown (because this will fix it!!)
5. Hold an Earth Day fair (because the best way to celebrate Earth Day is to use posterboard and markers)

Now that I have done my part, I encourage you to comment with your own ideas. Recycle your feces, buy some $10.00 light bulbs, or meditate (whatever it takes to clear you conscience).

Have a rockin’ Earth Day, you deserve it!

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Posted in Smart People, Smart Products, Stupid Ideas, Stupid People, Stupid Products |

9 Responses

1. jeremy Says:
   April 23rd, 2008 at 10:39 am

   6. Stay home from work.

   I find the best way to eliminate waste is to not waste my life.

2. Keelhaul Says:
   April 23rd, 2008 at 2:52 pm

   I celebrated by ripping my clothes off, taking a crap in the front yard and planting some corn in it for biofuel or organic food consumption……..I despise hippies.

3. even steven Says:
   April 23rd, 2008 at 4:23 pm

   For Earthday, I filled my truck’s gas tank with a blend of gasoline and ethanol. The more food we burn up, the more people will starve to death. A reduced population would be healthy for the environment. Somewhere out in the world, some innocent lichen will survive because there will be one less person to disturb the rock on which it’s growing.

4. Keelhaul Says:
   April 24th, 2008 at 1:52 pm

   I just threw everything I own into the volcano to please the lichen so he will bless me with a quick painless death to nurture his energy to devour future generations of mankind………I hope when they find me I’m covered in the earthy goodness of the lichen and he will grow strong like mother earth intended…Peace, love, trees man.

5. FhnuZoag Says:
   April 24th, 2008 at 9:52 pm

   So, um, does this blog do anything other than self-promotion?

   *yawns* and goes back to reading journals.

6. gtpunch Says:
   April 26th, 2008 at 12:45 am

   @even steven: amen to that, when we humans are all wiped out the earth can get back to wiping out species on it’s own. Save the Trilobite!

7. Michael Z. Williamson Says:
   April 26th, 2008 at 10:21 pm

   Every time someone says “Global warming,” I go out back and burn a tire.

8. yodee Says:
   May 2nd, 2008 at 1:13 am

   i celebrated it by eating all things green, so that my feces will turn green too.

9. 100% supported Says:
   May 8th, 2008 at 2:40 am

   rofl. you are so right man.

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